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28/8/2018

If you really want something, you have to ask for it.

 
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Kids do it all day long.  “Mum, can I have this, go there, do this, do that, please, please, please?” They can be relentless.  And it works for them!

It sounds simple, but the act of asking is actually very difficult for many of us.

The fear of rejection and potential embarrassment ensures our requests remain safely in our mind.  

However, mustering the courage to ask is essential.  

If you don’t, you can end up feeling resentful, frustrated, and just plain cranky.  

The reality is that other people rarely care as much about what we want as we do. And yet, when we are hurt that we are not getting what we want, too many of us fail to ask for a change.

People aren’t mind readers, so the more specific you can be in your request, the better. 

Here are a few examples of what I mean:

Don’t say: “Hi, I would like to take you out sometime.”
Say: “Hi, I’m having dinner with friends Saturday night at 8pm, I’d love you to come with me”

Don’t say: “Is there anything else I can help you with?” 
Say: “Do you have all the information you need to make a decision?”

Don’t say: “I need you help around the house”
Say: “Don’t leave clothes on the bathroom floor, rubbish bins go out on Tuesday’s, you do the washing up Friday nights” 

So just ask. Ask with confidence. Ask as if you expect to get it. Imagine the possibilities!

Lachlan via LI
7/12/2015 09:56:29 am

Great post Tony! It's funny how a question mark at the end of a sentence can make the words so much harder. Being comfortable asking questions is a underrated aspect of helping not only yourself but others too.

Tony
7/12/2015 10:01:39 am

Thanks and so true Lachlan, questioning is a key skill in communication, as is listening to the answers.

Monty via LI
7/12/2015 09:58:51 am

Great post! Cheers mate, Monty.

Tony
7/12/2015 10:02:05 am

Thanks Mont, all the best

Joe U via LI
7/12/2015 03:20:04 pm

Great post!

Tony
7/12/2015 03:21:07 pm

Thanks Joe for the note and encouragement!


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